When Turning 30 didn’t go as we would have liked, expected or planned…What do we do then? I, for sure, wasn’t going to sit around and mope about it.
There was no way I was going to look back at my 30th Birthday and think “Shit. That was so depressing.”
After the loss of my relationship, moving cities, lack of friendships and moving right back into my parents house…I found myself back to square one and wondering how did I get here?
Instead of self pity and wallowing in the feeling of emptiness, I thought to transmute this energy into something good.
I was going to make my 30th Year the best it can ever be and starting off by having the best 30th I could give myself at the time, with what I had…
Kickstarting the 30s with a last minute weekend itinerary (without breaking the bank):
Here are 10 ways I made my birthday weekend feel special and wait for the end for a bonus 10 more!
FRIDAY:
-
LUNCHTIME – POP INTO ONE OF YOUR FAVOURITE STORES AND MENTION IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY!
Before you go into any store, do a little research about where you can claim a birthday freebie. Here’s a few links that I used …unfortunately I didnt get round to claiming them as I was quite busy until the lead up to my birthday. So definitely leave some time beforehand if specified (so you don’t rock up on the day and feel disappointed).
https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/deals/birthday-freebies-discounts/
https://www.savethestudent.org/save-money/birthday-freebies-uk.html
https://www.latestfreestuff.co.uk/blog/top-birthday-freebies-discounts-2021-ultimate-guide/
I got some good miniature freebies from Space NK – how can you not?!
*Tip: I mentioned it was my birthday and actually asked if they were offering a birthday gift.
2) 6PM – VOLUNTEER AT YOUR LOCAL CHURCH OR CHARITY
The Galentines event that my church was throwing happened to randomly fall into my lap, when I least was expecting or even looking for it…but it was exactly what I needed. Instead of concentrating on the lack of, I was focusing on the positives in my surroundings, the good that these people were doing to make someone else feel special. The form of giving was important and definitely set the tone right for my birthday. To have hindsight and perspective.
*Tip: Check with your local churches, favourite charity if they have any upcoming events. Make sure you do leave some time for preparation of registering or training.
3) 10PM – PUT UP YOUR BIRTHDAY DECORATIONS!
Highly don’t recommend putting it up at this time but if you’re like me, have a full time job and doing 11034829727429 things at the same time, then getting back home late, amazon delivery arriving on the same day is probably the only time you’ll have time to do it…(my gosh that is tiring even typing it out)
*Tip: at least put them up a day before (however it might loose some air)…if not, ask a loved one to do it for you…or with you <3. There is no shame in asking (or hinting). Some people don’t know if that’s what you even want.
When you think of birthday decorations, it’s easy to think it should be someones job to do that. To experience the feeling of being surprised…but it could be a long time “waiting” for someone else to do it. So why not, make yourself happy and put a smile on your own face!
SATURDAY
4) 9AM – GO ALL OUT AND DRESS UP IN YOUR FAVOURITE ERA OR WEAR THAT SPARKLY OUTFIT!
I mean…this is a given! If you don’t dress up for your birthday then when are you ever going to?! Unless you decide to have a chilled one but even then, please let’s make some effort! Trust me, I love not having to do much and I see myself as a “Lazy high maintenance girly”…but if there’s ever a day to make yourself look fantastic – it’s your birthday!!!!
But i want you to take a step too far…I want you to dress up as OTT as possible. Whether it’s the full glam, or the colorful obnoxious outfit, or dressing up in a costume…(usually that’s saved for halloween and people stil rather make the crazy effort for then, than their own birthday…)
I decided to dress up as a disco barbie…1) if there was ever a era, i could have been born in – it would have been the 70s! Absolutely love the disco era. The music. The vibes. The looks…However I am not. And if I’m leaving my 20s…it’s gona be dressed up in my favourite era! And how fitting to do it with what i had planned…(see below). Also, I lowkey love the Barbie look – not the plastic, overdone surgery look…but dressed up in pink, fun make up…Blame my mum lol. I was obsessed with my barbie dolls growing up lol
5) 1PM – GO TO A SOBER RAVE, IF NOT – BOOK A FUN ACTIVITY / EVENT THAT’S GOING ON IN THE DAY
The perks of living in London is that there is always something going on, whatever your interest is.
I always enjoy doing a fun experience for my birthdays. Especially if it’s new and I’ve never done it before. It’s a great way of creating a lasting memory especially if it’s shared with others. And if it’s not – this is still your opportunity to make the most of it! If anything this idea works out best even if you’re lonely.
A chance to put yourself out there, get dressed up, and an excuse to look cute on your birthday.
Push out of your comfort zone and start interacting with new people…and who knows? With the possibility of making new friends!
Websites to check what’s going on:
– event brite / secret london / timeout . Otherwise, just google what your interests are and see what comes up!
My experience being at the Sober Rave:
It was my first time after being in the rave scene….this time completely sober! It’s amazing to see London offering more alternative offers, especially a huge hype around being sober.
I felt a bit uneasy at the start …mostly because I was processing adapting to a old familiar scene where I used to rely heavily on alcohol to get me in the party mood…So i’m not sure if it was my “old conditioning” kicking in but i felt soooo awkward lol I couldn’t really converse with people…Almost like i forgot my speaking abilities.
However, I just relaxed and got into the beat of the music. What I have always enjoyed. Dancing.
And the event was good fun! Great music. Fun, upbeat energy! You would never think it’s not like any other rave that you may have attended…the vibes were great. Loud music. Dark room. Vibrant people…I might say it might be better than a typical rave where everyone is either off their face (no shade. I’ve been that person) or too busy recording from their phone than actually enjoying it. (Says me. The one who can’t help but capture the moment! Lol the irony.) What a brilliant way to kick start the 30s.
6) WEAR A BIRTHDAY BADGE…YES, YOU READ IT RIGHT!
Before you scoff at reading this…don’t knock it before you try! Lol! I don’t know why more adults don’t do this…Yes. It may look a little silly. Childish, even.
But Birthdays are to be celebrated!!! It’s the DAY that you were born! This isn’t just some other day. Out of the trillion chances of being alive, you are today. And if you are still here with us, reading this post…then it’s a day WORTH making ALL the noiseeee!
We go through life taking it way too seriously, and as we get older, the less we care about our own birthdays. Perhaps, it’s a good thing – to not get upset if others don’t make the effort to make us feel special. But what a sad view to take on – to think or act like it’s any other day. Or too dim our lights and not make a fuss. Sure, there are some people in the world who prefer that…and I also was that person.
I would not even mention that my birthday was coming up – it felt too hurtful for people to know and not do anything about it…even a simple birthday message. There’s something funny about that isn’t it. Why does it bother us?
After the last few months/year I had, to have it all crashing down and loose everything…I wasn’t going to allow my birthday to be a reminder of my “loss”. That I had no partner, no friends around, no life, no plans…
So I decided to wear a Birthday Badge on the day of my birthday. And it was the best idea I had! Guaranteed, I felt a little silly at first…but after you see my birthday outfit below, you’ll realise that it really didn’t phase me and it was actually fun LOL. Standing on a busy tube, looking like a mix of a birthday cake slash disco barbie.
What a way to change up the boring day to day of getting around London and colour it in some vibrancy.
It’s typical London energy to avoid the crazy person and act like you can’t see them but there were lots of people who randomly wished me a happy birthday as I walked past. And it was such a great Ice breaker at the rave!!!
People are already in high spirits and probably looking for a reason to start interacting …so why not give them?! Especially when you’re sober, I feel the pressure is even more so – compared to when you’re drunk and your guard is low, filled with dutch courage.
What a beautiful way to feel loved and special on your Born day <3 As a result, I was able to start conversations with the people around me and have a great day!
7) 6PM – REACH OUT TO AN OLD FRIEND AND GO OUT FOR DINNER!
Birthdays can feel tough. It’s a day we usually spend with our loved ones…and I felt myself wanting to avoid it. My big birthday treat to
myself (see post about my experience with my bucket list) was booked for few weeks after, so I was left knowing I had to plan something last minute on the weekend of my actual birthday…As you can see where the inspiration behind this blog post came from lol I realised I had to confront the missing gap in my life…I could of done 2 things – let my ego get in the way and be like: “no! They should contact me” and allow negative thoughts to seep in like “why would they want to spend time with me”..or be the one to make the first move…Again. Why wait for missed opportunities? And to think I could have missed out on going out for dinner with a dear friend, just because of “worst case scenario”.
I actually invited him to the rave and he was kind enough to take me out to dinner and catch up properly. So the moral of the story is “you don’t know what will happen if you don’t try or ask…so make the first move!” (p.s. This doesn’t apply to dating as a female, so don’t get the wrong idea lol – unless that’s your thing then go ahead..).
Birthdays are always a great opportunity to rekindle lost friendships, nurture the relationships that you do have…because that’s what life is really about in the grand scheme of things.
9pm/10pm – get home and get to bed!!! Because that’s what 30s are all about lol Good riddance to the 20s and staying up all night, just to have the sunday written off….
Otherwise there wouldn’t be a Sunday edition 😉
SUNDAY
8) 9AM – WAKE UP! MEDITATE OR WRITE IN YOUR MORNING JOURNAL.
This is well needed after the busy week you’ve probably had and the hectic weekend I just planned for you 😉
- A moment to pause. Check in with yourself. Remember to look after your mental well being. And what better way to do it than this.
- Highly recommend 30 minutes of free flow writing if you have not adopted this habit. A way to just get everything from mind to paper and it’s incredible when you see how much you’re able to problem solve and gain more clarity.
I took this opportunity to self reflect on the year I had, what I had been feeling and how I was feeling in that current moment. And what did I wish for in the New Year. It’s a great practice to adopt especially if you’re a Londoner and your life is always on the go!
9) 1PM – BAKE YOUR OWN BIRTHDAY CAKEEEEE!!!!!
Now, you didn’t think i would make it convenient for you on the last day…now that you’re having a sober weekend – you have no excuse 😉
(that’s if you are.)
On a serious note, this was my favourite way I made my birthday feel special. Instead of getting a ready-made cake from the bakery or Tesco…it was actually beautiful to be part of the process and I probably would have never done it if I wasn’t having a single, “lonely” birthday.
And if it wasn’t for my birthday weekend, I probably wouldn’t have found the right excuse to bake so it’s win for everything!
With more time on your hands, get involved with baking your own cake – and get your parents or loved ones involved if that’s an option.
Plus it’s an affordable way of doing an activity which doesn’t cost a lot and brings you closer together as a result. The fact you made something beautiful and meaningful together.
I made a delicious Red Velvet cake because I wanted to feel boogie but choose from whatever you fancy or is your own personal favourite! IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY so indulge for a day ;] and whatever is leftover, do an act of kindness and give it away to work colleagues or put a smile on a stranger’s face.
- Here’s the recipe i used: https://www.recipetineats.com/red-velvet-cake/
10) 5PM – DIY PAMPER TIME!!!!!
FINALLY – TIME TO CHILLAXXXXX…Before then, 2 more things lol
Make a homemade hair and face mask…I promise this is the last thing. You wont regret it…unless if you don’t get rid of it properly and drain it down the sink…yes, don’t repeat my mistake LOL
Instead of spending money on expensive facials or ready made masks – do it for a quarter of the price and I promise you’ll get the same results!
For the best hydrating mask:
- Mash one avocado
- Add two tablespoon of plain yogurt
- Add one tablespoon of olive oil
- Add one tablespoon of honey
- Mix everything well together
- Apply for 15 to 20 minutes
- Rinse well, especially around the hairline
Hair Mask:
INGREDIENTS:
– 1 avocado
– 2 eggs
– 1 tablespoon of honey
– 1 tablespoon of Coconut Oil
DIRECTIONS:
- Mash avocado and put the mash in a mixing bowl.
- Add eggs, honey, and oil to the avocado mixture and mix well.
- Apply to your hair from the ends to the roots.
- Let sit for 15-20 minutes.
- Rinse.
And get yourself some bath salts or bath bombs and relax in the bath – let your hair marinade.
- I was toying with the idea of booking a spa day but in the grand scheme of things, this worked out perfectly with my weekend itinerary…i wouldn’t of been able to do all the things on sunday otherwise ! Plus it would have been on the spenny side…with that being said.
- Wowcher and Groupon always have some great deals! Worth checking out.
At last, you are done and the birthday weekend comes to an end! I finished the evening by putting some pizza in the oven and cracking open a non alcoholic bottle that my friend bought and ate my delicious cake!! And watched a movie with the parents.
TALK ABOUT A DREAMY WAY OF PLANNING AT THE LAST MINUTE! What a way to kick starting the 30s…CHEEERS TO BEING ALIVE!
(Bonus 10 more ideas coming soon! )